Anatomically Correct Things...

As many of you SHOULD already know, I have been asking for an anatomically correct sock monkey for years.  Years ago, I stumbled upon a website (probably looking for porn) that had pictures of GIANT ANATOMICALLY CORRECT SOCK MONKEYS!!!  This was inspiration! They were fantastic.  I didn't get this picture from the same pornographic site because I couldn't find it but it's very similar to the one that I originally wanted: 

 
This guy is about 8 feet tall.  I think that is far too tall for me.  Not only that but lets bring something up that I know you were already thinking...  Isn't the penis HUGE on that thing?  I think you would be getting ripped off on the anatomically correct thing on this guy because, well, what man that is 8 feet tall has a penis down to his knee soft?  I'm sure they exist but it would be the exception, not the rule.  


Back when I started wanting one, the website was the only place I could find that was even selling sock monkeys at the time!  Now, you can get anatomically correct in the 20" version too!  

AND they have anatomically correct females too!  I must admit that a vagina wouldn't be as much fun to make as a penis and testicles though.

You may be asking 'Why all this talk of anatomically correct sock monkeys?'  Well, here is your answer:  

In class yesterday, my teacher was giving a warning about using proper words for proper human parts (or sock monkey parts) explaining that she would not be using them to offend anybody but because that's what they are.  I'm sure you wouldn't appreciate it if you went in with a problem and your doctor told you that your twat was swollen.  

She told us about a teacher that she had that knew how uncomfortable these words can be to some people.  So what did he do?  The first day of class, he made them all turn to their neighbor in class and say 'penis, vagina, intercourse'.


I think his idea was genius and I think that would filter out a lot of kids that couldn't cut it but I say 'penis','vagina' and 'intercourse' so often that I would find an exercise like that boring.  Instead, we should do some different words.  Some that I prefer are: coitus, clitoris, vulva, labia, phallus, testis and scrotum (just to name a few).


The moral of the story:  I know you want to see pictures of my sock monkey but he is black and his penis blends with everything else in a picture.


Another moral of the story:  Don't be afraid to give your body it's due respect and refer to your parts as their proper names.